I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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