I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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