So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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