We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
