I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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