Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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