i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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