I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
