Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize