One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
