Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Randomize
