Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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