Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
