he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
