i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
