question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
