I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Randomize
