Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
