it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
