How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize