you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Your cock deserves a montage
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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