Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
