I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
my sisters under your porch take her home
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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