Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
