i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
