He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
he fucked my hip out of place.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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