I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize