Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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