Your tits are I can't wait for
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
