How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I came so hard my ears popped.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize