just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
