i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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