This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize