i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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