$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize