so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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