He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
