question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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