Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize