I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
