Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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