I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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