i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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