Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Randomize
