idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
