Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Who did Billy Mays play for?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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