i jhust puked up my retainher.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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