So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
