Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Randomize
