Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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